A gift for myself...

I began a process not too long ago. Seeking God. Seeking for healing and redemption. For peace and deliverance. A process that was brought-on by anxiety and has turned into the best decision I’ve made for myself. I seek to be a better version of myself, healthy physically, emotionally, mentally as well as spiritually.

 

 

                One of my favorite bible verses is “create in me a pure heart, o God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me” – Psalm 51:10. I love this verse because of many reasons. Growing up “positive reinforcement” was just not the norm for my mom. Verbal abuse was an every-day thing, so whenever an “outsider”- friend of the family, relative or stranger would tell me “You have such a beautiful heart” it made sense to the point that, my heart became the only thing I Loved about myself.

                My constant prayer to God was always “Please Lord, don’t allow things, people or circumstances change my heart, it’s the only good thing about me”

 

                Not knowing God on a personal level most of my life, I didn’t come across this verse until a little over 6 yrs. ago.  It made me truly self-examine and search deep. It made me think of forgiveness. As Christians we want to know and believe we don’t harbor “un forgiveness” in our heart.

Of course with matters of the heart- this becomes a little harder. How can we be sure? What is True forgiveness? What does that look like? How do we get there?

One evening, before my process started, I was having a whole-hearted conversation about this very topic with a good friend. We began to talk and came to a Halt. Where was I in my forgiveness process? At the end of this conversation I felt like a ton of bricks were dropped on me, it seemed as though I was unable to forgive [ in this case my mother] because it felt as if I was letting her “off the hook”

I felt broken all over again, how can this be? Although unintentional, I was perhaps harboring feelings of un forgiveness. This went against everything I had tried to do, prayed for and wanted for myself. It seemed that “Forgiveness” was a bit unclear to me.

What does it mean to forgive? Does it mean the ‘slate’ is wiped clean and you start from scratch with that person, as if nothing ever happened? Do you reconcile? Do you turn your cheek 1 million times to prove you have forgiven?

 The very thought forgiving my mother almost paralyzed me from fear. Fear that I may have to reconcile, and let her in my “safe-space”. My safe-space was the place I now resided, far away from her harm, far enough where she could no longer physically hurt me, but it was so clear that she could still hurt me emotionally and mentally.

What if in my “healing process” God asks me to let her back in? I have to abide by his word right? But it’s scary when you don’t know what he will ask of you when you truly surrender.

The bible says “Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that ‘by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established’. And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses to even hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector.” Matthew 18:15-17

Having tried to exhaust my physical means to proceed, and move forward, without bondage, baggage or pain, I tried to bring up my thoughts and emotions regarding the problems between mother and daughter I’ve been carrying for most of the years of my life. It was this verse that brought me some peace. Because I had done what the bible said to do, and meant it. Obeying Gods word is extremely important to me, so I needed his truth not just to rely on my own understanding of the situation.  Further down in that same chapter, verse 19 Jesus says “Again I say to you, that if two of you agree on earth concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My Father in heaven”.

I have come to realize something, I cannot force anyone to do anything. I cannot rely on others’ actions for my own recovery. Closure is for me. I must fight for it. Forgiving someone isn’t “letting them off the hook” its letting MYSELF go FREE!! Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself!!!!  After ears of baggage, burdens, I surrendered them to God.   “Come to me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest” – Matthew 11:28 All I can do from here on out is pray.

Prayer is powerful.

 ”Confess your trespasses to one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much” – James 5:16.  I can pray for my own healing as well as for my mother’s. I can pray for my deliverance, as well as for my mother’s. I can pray for redemption for the both of us according to Gods will, not ours.

 In this I find peace. I find FREEEDOM.

 

 

“I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born” Isaiah 66:9

God’s promises are real. His word is truth. I may not know what the future holds, I know that as long as I keep my eyes on Him, I’m in the best hands.

“For I know the thoughts I have towards you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil,  to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11

 

A Dash of inspiration

Hello everyone. I hope all finds you well.

For the past couple weeks I've been brainstorming my next blog post since my postings have been scarce and the last one was almost six months ago. I wanted to think of a delicious recipe, enticing, beautiful.

I needed inspiration.

I always get inspired when I go to the grocery store and I surround myself with an array of colorful produce, herbs, and spices, or simply a nice cut of meat.The last few times I've done my grocery shopping, however, I have honestly been too focused on getting the job done, grabbing what's on my shopping list, and getting out. I found myself wanting to blog, but couldn’t without the inspiration I was looking for.

Late last night, my wonderful friend asked if I could write a recipe she could feature on her blog. A recipe with a healthy twist, which I often do — but she made it even more interesting when she also asked me to tie in faith, a scripture, or a testimony.

I was instantly excited. This was the inspiration I needed.

You see, she is the very person who encouraged me to begin blogging. Back in Fall 2010, I had a conversation with this friend who blogs, and she inspired me to start one by sharing my recipes with the world. I expressed to her that I wasn't, what you call, "a writer," but she responded with, "but you're a cook." I thought, “Hmmm, OK, you have a point.”

Exploring this blogging idea further, I said, “OK, I'll do it!” I do love sharing my food and my recipes with people so it's a 'win' either way.

I began looking for a fitting name for my blog. I started brainstorming. One morning, another co-worker came to me and shared her thoughts on a perfect name for my blog, "Salt of the Earth,” she said, “Go to the book of Matthew.” Hesitantly I did. "Go to chapter 5:13." The scripture read: "You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt has become tasteless, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot by men."

I have to be honest, at first, I didn't understand what this scripture meant or why it would be appropriate for a food blog. After studying the verse, it dawned on me; "You are the salt of the earth" says I am seasoned with the Word of God. His scriptures. His truth. I go through this world as salted and "seasoned" by His Word. How much do I read, meditate, and apply the scriptures in my daily life? On the other side of that, how unsalted, unseasoned am I?

The scripture is saying that when you become unsalted, then you are no longer good.

Once I understood the depth of this verse, I absolutely loved it!

I found it to be extremely fitting, and that is how I was inspired to name my blog.

How does this relate to food? Well, what makes food good? Seasoning! FLAVOR!

If food isn't well seasoned, tasteless, and bland — it is no good.

God gave us his Word for spiritual substinance.

"Give us this day our daily bread" Matthew 6:11

"It is written: 'Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God’ " Matthew 4:4.

We need as much spiritual substinance as we do physical. That's where my blog can help you find new, easy recipes to try something you’ve never attempted before. I want to incorporate recipes that are not only easy and delicious, but healthy. Having had my personal health obstacles, I wanted to show people you don’t have to compromise one food trait (great taste) for the other (healthy eating).

This inspires me! What inspires you?

Getting into today's recipe and keeping with the theme, let's talk seasonings!

As a cook, I like to season my food and ensure it has flavor.

I started playing around with making my own seasoning mixes because many store bought, premade seasonings contain unhealthy fillers you may not want in your food.

This is a 'clean' seasoning mix I use regularly in my kitchen; it has become a ‘staple’ and I even used it for my wedding favors.

The main ingredients are always the same, but I do interchange spices depending on the meal I'm preparing.

This recipe is super simple- and will yield a 10 oz fill of the dry mix.

I used a 16oz Mason jar.

Add your spices (shown here in 1/2 cup or 1/4 cup increments), close the lid, shake it up, and its ready to be a staple in your kitchen too. Enjoy!

 

 

Let Food be your medicine...

When we read  motivational or inspirational quotes such as the one I used - we are usually enlightened and get a sense of empowerment from them. Maybe we like that we can relate or apply them to our lives, unless its something too close to home; touching subjects like food and health which both are on the top of my priority list.

Being a foodie at heart, what does one do when food becomes the exact thing that hinders your quality of life? Do you adapt a new way of life, eat better to help your health or do you rely on the conventional and much faster (and lets not forget -easier) modern medicine? In a society where we live for instant gratification and patience is hard to come by, making a life change seems such a large task and may even appear to be a hassle.

 I never thought I would ever give up eating what ever I wanted, until I no longer had a choice.

I was Diagnosed with Psoriatic Arthritis back in 2006 (while on Active Duty- which later led to my Medical Discharge in2008). What I though was a simple pinched nerve turned out to be something way more serious than I could have ever imagined. Shortly after my diagnosis I was prescribed medication (not getting paid - so I wont write the name ha!)This stuff had way more side effects than I bargained.

Being naive and uneducated I felt hopeless and began feeling sorry for myself.

"why am I being burdened with this at the ripe age of 24?" "there goes my future!"

"woe is me"

I learned to live with the physical pain.

Fast-Forward to 2010- at this point I'm tired of not finding relief. Tired of taking the harsh medications. and most importantly- the debilitating pain. Needing assistance to get from point A to point B. Simple tasks like getting out of bed in  the morning, Bathing,  walking, Grabbing a pinch of salt,  sitting too long, even getting a full nights rest where the pain didn't wake me up at 3 a.m. was far fetched and going on a jog was just not in my cards any more. ( for a track and cross-country runner since the age of 9- that was a tough pill to swallow).Having to sleep most of the time on my couch propped up for back support- instead of sharing my bed with my husband, Not being able to carry my Son- that was worst of all. I want to thank my Husband for being such a trooper though the rough days and restless nights. I would be lost without you .



I've had to give myself my shots ( meds) every 2 weeks, which by the way doesn't help with the pain- so I had to also on top of the wretched shots, I had to take a nice little cocktail of pain medication.

Made it interesting trying to live a normal productive life. Going to work, while going to school. Feeling tired all the time.

Feeling loopy from the medication.

Not getting enough sleep because your pain doesn't let you.

Lacking energy. Feeling hopeless.

Gotta keep trucking, got bills to pay!

I began doing research. More specifically I was looking for homeopathic  remedies.

I kept running into "dietary" information, thing I should stop eating to reduce the inflammation in my joints to alleviate the pain.

I would consistently ask a close friend of mine, who was going through Natural Medicine school of things I could do or take for my pain. Any alternatives- and she would always try to help in any way she could.

Turns out everything I love- was on the "do-not eat"  list.
Saturated fats, Trans fats, simple and refined carbs.
in other words, No medium rare steak, no queso-dip with chips, no funnel cake dusted with powder



sugar. no smothered pork chops, No French fries ( I love French fries so much), Rocky Road ice cream, chocolate cake, and the list goes on.

I stopped eating red meat first because it was an automatic flare-up that would sent me into an immobile state and debilitating pain once I had digested and it was in my system.



I have woken up screaming from a dead sleep from the throbbing, stabbing pain.


I stopped fried foods, eliminated vegetable oil, switched to olive oil completely and later stared using coconut oil as well.
I knew that in order to see better results I would have to dive in to a much more strict diet.

I thought " ok, I can do this!"

Shortly after, I  began a job at a Raw Vegan Café, which I thought was just fantastic- I can learn a healthier route- and seek my relief through my diet.

I committed myself to a Raw-Vegan diet (consisted of  veggies herbs, cold pressed oils, nutritional yeast, , fruits, nuts, seeds, water, sprouts, legumes, nothing cooked, to mention a few things)  

Subsequently I was enrolled into culinary school- where cooking, tasting and eating a plethora of Non- Vegan cuisine  was on the agenda everyday.

Being Human and weak to delicious food, my raw vegan diet only lasted 3 weeks.

Not really allowing it to truly take effect as I was ingesting other food during that time.

By far- the hardest "diet" I ever attempted.

Now 2014-

a few years wiser, having changed my diet in small steps through the years, my arthritis is still wreaking havoc on my joints.

A friend and I embarked on a "Vegan-Challenge" together as accountability partners as well as each others cheerleaders. The challenge was to exclusively eat Vegan for a period of 30 days.

I went into the challenge super excited and really looking forward to what ever it would bring forth. Energy boost, pain relief, better sleep but more importantly I knew this was the boost I needed to really take charge of my health and head in a better direction.

Having both a culinary background and raw-vegan experience made this challenge an easier transition. I used the tools I have acquired through the years and put them to use for one common goal.

Better quality of life.

Through the years I've heard people say things like "I could never go vegan" or " I will never stop eating meat" " I can't give up my favorite foods" "better you than me!" Believe me- I get it. I used to say the same thing.

I will chose health over my taste buds every time. Don't get me wrong, I love good food and that is precisely why I have made an attempt to make every vegan meal delicious and flavorful without sacrificing its "vegan integrity ".
I have transformed some of my favorite things to eat into an acceptable vegan version. I hadn't been to creative in the kitchen lately- so this challenge awoke my creativity once again.

Smoothie Prep, Bean and spinach soup topped with avocado, overnight oats, peanut butter snack

Acai smoothie, Tempeh tostadas, Roasted veggies sandwich , ademame and tempeh salad

Plan-tbased protein smootie and veggies with hummus, tofu tacos, vegan Alfredo pasta, Tofu stir-fry

Vegan coconut "shrimp" with pineapple infused rice noodles,  veggie dogs, quesadilla, tofu stir fry with rice and pigeon peas, fried plantains and avocado.

Just to give you an idea of the type of food I ate throughout the 30 days. Kept a variety and made every dish flavorful.

On day 8 experienced a breakthrough. I realized I was able to get a full nights rest with no interruption from my back pain. I began to realize that the high humidity and rainy weather weren't debilitating me like they would normally do ( Florida gets constant rain showers and I was reminded every time through my joints) Except for this time.

I was ecstatic.

Now more than ever I was assured that this was the right thing to do for my body. Its almost like I could see a light at the end of my extremely long and pain filled tunnel. In a world where I hadn't felt relief in years and I had honestly forgot what life was before the pain, I had found relief even if for a few days at  time. I did notice that after 3 days of not using Chia Seeds, my hips started wreaking havoc on me. 

That is such a huge breakthrough for me.

I know it was a long time coming for me. I am extremely grateful I had someone as my accountability partner through the entire journey- it always makes anything easier when you have someone else going through it with you. Thanks Chrystal.

If you're in near the Tucson, AZ area and are looking to get in shape, want a good positive group and an inspirational butt-kicking trainer, check you RBF Bootcamp https://www.facebook.com/groups/roadtobeingfit/

I will definitely be making adjustments to my diet from this point forward. I will most likely remain
vegetarian for sure sprinkling vegan throughout my diet.

If I have animal protein it would most likely be fish- if I have to.

I have found the relief I've been looking for, for almost a decade and I feel extremely grateful.

I wanted to document my journey to help anyone I could. In any way that I could.

If you have related to anything I have said at any point, if you're tired of living in a life of pain, if you're at your wits end, I'm here to tell you : There is hope!!! you have to be willing to take that first step, change the way you look at food. Look at what you're eating and how it affects you - and ask yourself "is it worth it?". Take that step, make a change for your own good. Eat yourself towards Health! It is absolutely worth it.


I'm thinking of doing a continuation to this entry to  talk about specific food I ate and how I was able to maintain my wits ins and nutrients. 

Its hard living with something when no one can understand the pain.

Take your life back!!!

STAY STRONG!!! THERES HOPE!